Posted by: husbandandfatheroffour | September 20, 2012

Can You Answer These questions?

So let me ask a question; what holds people back from doing things in their life?

What stops people from things like moving to Europe, taking on a new job, starting their own business, quitting a job, chasing a dream, or just doing whatever it is that makes them happy?  Is it mostly fear?  Is it money?  Are they afraid of what other people might think? 

Think back through your lives and think about all the stuff you wanted to do or even still want to do.  What stopped you and what is stopping you?  What stops us from deciding to take a job that is less pay but would make you happy?  Sure you might have to rearrange your lifestyle but wouldn’t that be worth it?  If you have always wanted to move to Australia, then why didn’t you?  Was it the excuse you didn’t have the money, family didn’t want you to, friends thought that it was a dumb idea, being too far away from family, etc.?  Are those acceptable excuses?  Should any excuse be acceptable that stops us from being happy?

What if you wanted to just move about all your life, living here and there for a couple years at a time?  What stops you?  If all your family had gone to Harvard but you really wanted to go to Yale then why didn’t you?  If there were open tryouts for the Cubs and you have always wanted to see if you could make it on a professional baseball team, then why wouldn’t you go try out?  What would be the worst that could happen?  Easy – you don’t make the team, which means you are not in any worse place than you were.

I could go on and on with different scenarios.  We have all not done something we wanted to do for one reason or another.  I only ask then, why do we talk ourselves out of it?  In my opinion it is all because of fear.  We are afraid of the unknown factors of what our choices could bring.  Maybe it won’t make us happy or the job won’t be the experience we thought it would.  Maybe the new business fails or it is just too much being that far away from family.  But how are we supposed to know that unless we try?  On the other hand are we wrong if we don’t?  If you are content and happy where you are and what you are doing in your life, then what is wrong with that?  Is being content or afraid right or wrong?  Does it have to be either?

I am not sure about the answers to any of this.  I know there are things my wife and I would like to do or would have liked to have done but can I say our life is worse or better for not doing them?  Should we let fear stop us from doing anything and is being content good enough?  Should we worry about what others say or is your own opinion enough?  Let me know your thoughts and opinions.  Share your stories of triumph or failure and whether that changed how you have gone about things since then.     



  1. Hey we did it several times. Took the risk to fail. We moved to Arizona and took lesser paying jobs and went from a 3000 square foot house to a 1000 sq. ft. condo. Fast forward 18 years and we feel we are much happier owning our own business and not tied to the factory we left. We own 3 houses and are looking at condos in San Diego now. Woo hoo…..

  2. Oh I love this post as I struggle to make big moves. Before I was dating my now husband I lived with little fear of doing/going where I wanted too. Was it a mistake to marry someone who doesn’t live life the same way??? Only time will tell. I think finding balances is what’s important, is the risk worth the potential gain.

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